You know how I thought the week for Chinese New Year would be a holiday so I could catch up on everything?
Yeah. No. So here's a long, rambling, journal that will hopefully make up (but probably not) for my absence - and what will most likely be my continued absence. Sorry. Exams in May. I can't wait for after-May. I can't even imagine after-May. Everything is oscillating between senior-itis and stress (and the two are definitely related). Oof. I apologise in advance if this journal is tired and messy, it's because I'm tired and messy.
University stuff: I have offers from Queen Mary (in London) and Sheffield (in, uh, Sheffield) as well as the one from King's College London; and the rejection from Cambridge (which I'm OK with, don't worry! - I have friends with offers who're stressing out because the offers are so high; I know I couldn't have taken that kind of pressure). I'm still waiting on the University of Edinburgh. If I get an offer from them, I'll have to decide between Edinburgh and King's, which is ... going to be a difficult choice. Have any of you been to either places? I've visited London but not Edinburgh; thoughts?
I swear I have things to say that aren't about school. Case in point: I cut my hair short recently and it's brilliant. Extremely short, pixie-cut short; it's awesome and I love it. Previously, it was about waist-length. Pretty, but a hassle.
And despite all the stress, there's been a lot of wonderful news lately - it's just that the stress is more obvious. I might have said already I got full marks (!) on my Sappho and Cummings research paper, which was lovely, and I recently found out that I also got full marks (!!) on my individual oral commentary or IOC for English, which is essentially a terrifying twenty minute ordeal, ten minutes of which are focused on in-depth analysis of a random poem you pick out of about twenty poems you've studied and the next ten minutes are answering discussion questions on a random prose you pick out of two works you've studied. We did John Donne for poetry; Hamlet and Wuthering Heights for prose. It's a great assessment, actually, in terms of learning and education, but still hellish.
By the way, we read Arcadia by Tom Stoppard and Top Girls by Caryl Churchill lately for English - they're both amazing, beautiful plays, and I highly recommend both, especially TG.
Last, but definitely not least in absolutely lovely, lovely news: a poem of mine, Apostasy, will be appearing in Alliterati Magazine's Issue 14 on March 1st, so keep your eyes open for that! Or, not, because I'll update this journal/put up a new journal with a link and joyousness anyway when the issue comes out.
The title of the journal's from Sunset by Rainer Maria Rilke; here, have an excerpt:
leaving you (it is impossible to untangle the threads)
your own life, timid and standing high and growing,
so that, sometimes blocked in, sometimes reaching out,
one moment your life is a stone in you, and the next, a star.
How are you, how have you been, what're you reading?